(A) 山田さんは私の息子に本をくれました。 Yamada-san gave a book to my son.
(B) 私の息子は山田さんに本をあげました。 My son gave a book to Yamada-san.
As you can see, different verbs are used to describe different cases of giving and receiving. To understand the grammatical rule for this, you must be aware of “proximity to the speaker” and “direction of benefit”. For proximity to the speaker, I will use the terms “in group” and “out group”: the former is for people who are relatively close to the speaker socially, and the latter is for people who are not. For example, my son is a member of my in group, and Yamada-san is not. For the direction of benefit, I will use the term “inward” when the benefit comes from someone in one's out group. Sentence (A) is a good example where direction of benefit is inward, and you must use くれる for such a case. You must use あげる for all other cases.
If Hiroshi, a friend of yours, gives a book to Sayaka, another friend of yours, direction of benefit is not inward. Therefore, you should use あげる to describe Hiroshi’s action.
ひろしはさやかに本をあげました。 (Correct) Hiroshi gave a book to Sayaka.
ひろしはさやかに本をくれました。 (Incorrect)
In other words, the verb くれる is used when the giver is in the speaker's out group, and the receiver is in the speaker's in group. In all other cases, the verb あげる must be used.
Japanese Version
(B) 私の息子は山田さんに本をあげました。 My son gave a book to Yamada-san.
As you can see, different verbs are used to describe different cases of giving and receiving. To understand the grammatical rule for this, you must be aware of “proximity to the speaker” and “direction of benefit”. For proximity to the speaker, I will use the terms “in group” and “out group”: the former is for people who are relatively close to the speaker socially, and the latter is for people who are not. For example, my son is a member of my in group, and Yamada-san is not. For the direction of benefit, I will use the term “inward” when the benefit comes from someone in one's out group. Sentence (A) is a good example where direction of benefit is inward, and you must use くれる for such a case. You must use あげる for all other cases.
If Hiroshi, a friend of yours, gives a book to Sayaka, another friend of yours, direction of benefit is not inward. Therefore, you should use あげる to describe Hiroshi’s action.
ひろしはさやかに本をあげました。 (Correct) Hiroshi gave a book to Sayaka.
ひろしはさやかに本をくれました。 (Incorrect)
In other words, the verb くれる is used when the giver is in the speaker's out group, and the receiver is in the speaker's in group. In all other cases, the verb あげる must be used.
Japanese Version
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